Gnocchi Soup Fantasy Football Newsletter Issue 9
An Interview with the Interviewer
In this issue:
Special guest interviewer and former writer of this very paper comes out of retirement for the occasion.
We have to talk about the turn-style #1 position in this league and the likelihood of it changing yet again this week!
More game of the week talk and a little prep for Rivalry Week.
Cripplers Head Coach Sits Down with Former Writer Jon Sidders
Jon: What is this place?
Joe: This issue 9 of the Gnocchi Soup Fantasy Newsletter bro! Quite an upgrade from using Microsoft Publisher and printing paper copies huh?
Jon: Yeah! It’s nice… roomy even! So let’s get to it coach. How do you continue to start the regular season so strong? You have started the last three seasons with just a couple of losses…the one season I believe you only carried a tie into the double-digit weeks of the season.
Joe: Yeah man it has been a wild couple of years. As it’s been stated in precious interviews “skill” is a funny word to assign to this sport. I don’t personally believe in luck but that certainly seems a much better explanation. I do think I have drafted better these past few years but there is no secret. I stopped wasting $15 dollars on a football magazine during preseason and mostly go “best available”.
Jon: Now let’s deal with the elephant in the room…or should I say “rhino” given your mascot: What is happening to your post-season play? Is it injuries or bad coaching?
Joe: Very leading question, thanks! I’d say both and here’s why: Injuries are only permitted to be that kind of a problem as a result of bad coaching. This year for example, every team in our league has been riddled with injuries. Coaches have to gauge when it is time to wait for someone to come back, and when it is time to pull the plug and move on. Commissioner Isaac has been very generous to allow us an IR sport to slide our more severe injured players to but we need to be wise with that too. You can’t move someone there that’s not coming back this season, that just doesn’t make any sense. Dump them and move on.
Jon: Do you have a different strategy for this year? I see you are currently in first place [at the time of this interview The Cripplers were in first place, they have since fallen] so you have that seemingly going for you once again, what will you change about your upcoming post-season play?
Joe: Well my best chance is that first round bye - removing my own chance of losing my way out in round 1 like I did to you a few years back.
Jon: Memories…
Joe: Yeah. I have also attempted to line up some players for my bench that are likely to take over starting roles later in the season.
Jon: Smart. So would you say that you are basically just trying to do what I have always done?
Joe: No. I wouldn’t say that.
Jon: Who do you feel is the biggest threat in our league right now?
Joe: I would have said The Deanfighters or Long-Term Threats but injuries are starting to take their toll it seems. They are still going to be tough to beat but I’d say the biggest threat (great potential team name by the way) is Caleb’s #1 Team Winning it ALL.
Jon: Even with that name?
Joe: Yeah, not a fan of the name at all. It’s been a lot to type each week. Honestly he destroyed me last week and he’s got some folks thanks to your QB Tua that will just now be starting to pour it on.
Jon: Listen this is my interview. I’d appreciate it if you didn’t bring up my injury-ridden team at this time.
Joe: Bro you have done a great job of giving me very little to talk about most of the season… I’ll honor your request.
Jon: Are you happy the trophy is finally back in the league?
Joe: Yes! I’m shocked that the Digger ancient victory was enough to hold onto it for so long. Especially when coach Marvin insisted on moving the team to the WEB and changing the name. Has there been a dirtier move since the Colts left Baltimore?
Jon: I’ll ask the questions here, thanks. Who do you feel will win the Gnocchi Souper Bowl?
Joe: Jon, it really looks like Caleb will be there for sure. He’s scored the fourth most points in the league but he has also allowed the second fewest. If that trend continues he won’t be stopped. I think he will have a rematch with his grandfather in the Souper Bowl and when given the chance I will ALWAYS say “Joe wins”!
Jon: How about the NFL’s big dance?
Joe: I know your a Bears fan but I think the Lions win the NFC…though the Redskins, (yes they will always be the Redskins to me), will likely make the playoffs for the first time since 2007. What a time to be alive! I think the AFC championship will involve the Chiefs but I want to see the Ravens get past them. I think my Broncos have a shot at the playoffs but since no one else cares to beat the Chiefs it will be too little too late for us.
Jon: Excuses, excuses…
Joe: Yeah…true…how did that Bears game end against the Redskins last week?
#1 Turn Style Continues
Once again, The Cripplers had their time to enjoy the number one spot in the league but it ended after just one week. Three weeks ago, the Long-Term Threats were number one but had it taken from them as well. Caleb’s #1 Team Winning it ALL is to blame for both of those unseating’s and now he FINALLY as a chance to defeat someone as well as claim that coveted position that has been a part of his team name for so long if he triumphs over The Deanfighters this week.
We once again have two games that merit game of the week picks. The entire league should benefit from the conclusion of this three week gauntlet as the top 4 teams have all been made to beat up on one another during this period of time.
This week The Cripplers (#3) face Long-Term Threats (#4). These two have been playing against one another across multiple sports for over 20 years now and Yahoo’s projections have them split very evenly this week. The Long-Term Threats have more to lose right now since both The Invaders and the Spider Biters are hot on their tail.
The matchup I’m most interested in though is our second pick which is The Deanfighters (#1) facing Caleb’s (#2) Team. She came out as a powerhouse early in the season and he’s come on strong late. They both will have some bye-week questions to answer, but this should be a slugfest! I personally believe the QB’s will be the deciding factor. If the Broncos can stop Lamar Jackson, the Deanfighters may have a chance. This is the last truly difficult game Caleb has for the season. If he wins here, it is very likely he will win at least three of the remaining five games which should be enough for a first round bye in the playoffs.
Rivalry week is week 10 folks and here are your match ups:
Now is the time to start trash-talking and hype up your matchups. A few of these already have game of the week potential but you can make the difference in getting your match up selected for those honors. Head to the league chat or start talking.
You can also submit an article for next week’s issue if you would like by emailing me at pastorjoegmbc@gmail.com. We want to be friendly in our ribbing so all submissions will be considered but also reviewed before publication.
Next week we focus on Rivarly Week! We do not have an interview scheduled for this issue as we are making room for YOUR submissions. If you have something to say, we want to hear it! See you next time Soupers!